Are you thinking no one measures up to my ex? Do you find that you are constantly comparing every guy to your ex? Is this messing up your love life? Are you still secretly hoping that you ex might come back to you? Do you think that “no one measures up to my ex”, every time you meet a new guy? If you can relate to these questions, then you may need to do some reality checking.
I am a guy and I would like you to know that this is pretty normal. Thinking that “no one measures up to my ex” may be completely normal, however when it starts messing with your head, then you may start to have a real problem. You cannot go through your entire life comparing every to your ex.
No one measures up to my ex how do I move on?
Okay don’t get angry with me, but there is a big possibility that you are not ready to move on yet. You may need to still deal with your last relationship. It may be a good idea to gain some clarity and closure on your last relationship before you enter into a new one.
The problem with this line of thinking
Even though you may not be able to change your thoughts, this can be detrimental to your future. It also is not fair to always make a guy measure up to standards which may not even be realistic. I would like to question your line of thinking by asking you, if your ex was the perfect guy why did it end? He couldn’t have been that perfect if it didn’t work out and you are not left alone and in this position.
Give everyone a fair chance
Even though you may be constantly comparing every guy to your ex, this does not mean that you shouldn’t give guys a fair chance. After all it probably took you a while to have strong feelings for your ex. Remember that the more you get to know someone the more you will learn about them. It is unfair to a new guy that you are dating to expect him to measure up to these ideals that you have in your head.
If you are going to go back out there into the dating world, it is going to be within your best interest and the best interest of your future boyfriend to be open minded. You should at the very least be prepared to give everybody a fair chance and give them a clean slate.
Relationship experts will tell that in many cases after a break up females tend to cling to the good and forgot all the bad. Now the biggest problem with this is that girls fail to remember all the bad stuff about their ex’s. It is important to also remember why the relationship didn’t work and all his imperfections. Nobody is perfect and it is very dangerous to only focus on the good aspects of your past relationship and to ignore the bad.
I am not telling you exclusively dwell on the negative, but I am rather trying to help you gain a realistic perspective. If you view your ex boyfriend in a realistic light, it will be easier for you to get over him and to move on with your life. Once you stop holding him to these high standards and putting him on a pedestal in your head, you will be surprised at how helpful this can be.
Look at your needs and not your wants
For many females the reason why they compare everyone to their ex, is because they are focusing more on their needs and less on their wants. It is great to want a really attractive guy, but what you may need a good guy who can take care of your, regardless of what he looks like.
Most females need a guy who can make them feel extremely special. The chances are high that guys who are players will not be able to help you out in this regard. It is important to focus on what and who is good for you, in order to be able to honestly move forward.
It will be okay
You need to know that although it may seem impossible to move on now, the truth is that it will get easier and easier over time. You may need to be patient and put in some work, but trust me when I tell you that another amazing guy will come along.
He may not come along when you are looking for him, but he is out there somewhere. The good news is that he not only will measure up to your ex, he will far exceed your ex and be even better than him in your eyes. When this happens, you will never have to worry that no one measures up to my ex ever again.