You just got out of a relationship and things didn’t end so well. Some words were said in the heat of the moment and now you feel depressed and lonely. You then ask yourself, what’s the best thing to do after a break up? Quite honestly, the best thing to do is to let the emotions pour out. Cry. From the perspective of someone looking on the outside in, girls are at their worst when they keep all of these emotions built up.
Yes, you’re getting attention, but it’s not the attention that you really want or need. No one, not even your girlfriends, wants to be around you when you’re sad and depressed. Handle that on your own time, then when you’re ready, talk it out and focus on life again.
Remember the Good Times
Always remember the good times, but also remember why things didn’t workout. There is always a cause and effect for why things happen in relationships, so it’s never just one persons fault – it takes two. It’s time to be mature enough to accept the reality, and now it’s time to focus on the solutions.
What Did I Learn? What to do after a break up?
The best possible way to regain a happy lifestyle is to take the positives from the heartache. What did you learn? Instead of thinking about the things you didn’t like, and why you broke up, start thinking about the things you did like instead. You’re using the same amount of energy, but now you’re channeling it into something that will have a more positive outcome. Little by little these thoughts will build on each other, opening your eyes to a clearer state of mind and a happier you. So learn from the experience, take the positives and put your next foot forward.
Regain Control of Your Emotions
When you’re still thinking about your ex here and there, it’s not healthy for you to get back on the market – yet. See most guys can spot an emotional wreck when they see one. She’s usually out partying, wearing skimpier clothing that she usually did, and really could care less about what other people think of her. It’s not attractive and it isn’t something that’s going to help you for the long term. So what will?
Getting control of your emotional state again is crucial to re-entering the dating scene. Guys would rather not deal with the emotions that you come with, instead we’d rather be around a fun happy girl who is self aware and confident that she can be herself without relying on someone else for that emotional support. So the best outcome of your question ‘What to do after a break up‘ plain and simple, we love independent women. Use this experience as an oppotunity for personal development. If you come back to the market to soon, you’ll seem clingy and easy, which is something you need to deal with before you decide to go out and start drinking your pain away.
It’s very easy for women to start comparing the new guys they date to their ex. Look, as soon as you start associating your ex boyfriend with the new guy, you’re setting yourself up for failure internally which will only create the worst possible outcomes for you externally when you are working though what to do after a break up..
This not only hurts you deep down, but it also makes the new guy you’re dating wonder what the heck happened to the sweet girl he first started dating. Guys can accept a certain amount of emotions, and are willing to talk about your past if need be, but we’d much rather focus on the future.
When you start to compare, you immediately expect the same things your ex did from the new guy. You’re only going to make yourself more disappointed and more emotionally vulnerable to thinking “I can’t find a good guy.” It’s not that good guys don’t exist, you’re just making it mentally impossible every time you do comparisons – so cut that out and accept the qualities your new guy has to offer.
Live Your Life
As stated earlier, men love women who are independent and don’t need them. It’s true! When you don’t need us, we want you 100x’s more! There’s something about it that attracts us and makes us want to better ourselves just so we can be on the same level as you. So start living your life again, regain that self confidence and start to date if you want to. There’s no rule book that says you have to start dating immediately again. Take your time and observe the game a little bit, then when you’re ready, make your move.
Always remember that you determine your own happiness and no one else. As you continue to grow as a person and start doing the things you love, you’ll naturally attract people who love the same things you do, and this will lead to a real relationship rather than a forced one. So love yourself, love what you do and the right person will love you to.
What to do after a break up ? – Focus on yourself for a while and take it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Be grateful for all the things ou do have in your life. List them daily if you like.
Image Credit: Bored-Now